Day 2 Choices

Today started early for me 4:30am to be exact. I could not get comfortable I was in the mist of horrible back and nerve pain. I got up and started praying seeking the Lord and asking what was going on with a few things I was about to embark on..One being a play I had done in the beginning of the summer and I was so excited to hear they were doing it again… As the details came forth I realized I would not in fact be able to do the play. Timing is everything! Being obedient to the Lords timing and voice for me is pivotal to my life. My flesh is screaming in pain as I wrote the Director to let her know sadly I would have to pass on doing another run. But, peace flew in and rested upon my heart once I had.

Peace is our promise as believers Peace was left for us. Peace is a free gift! Peace in the mist of trails. Peace no matter what is going on. We can have peace! We can be carriers of Peace and give it away. We can bring peace with us and change the atmosphere.

Today, I felt like Abraham putting his promise on the alter. I love to preform, love to make people laugh and love love love the stage. BUT, I love and trust the LORD more than my desires and dreams. I know that there is a purpose to why I can't do the play and I trust my father in heaven and I am grateful that I can be lead by PEACE.

Side note:
I was thinking this morning while I played on the floor with my 3 year old and all was wonderful in our world..(Even though the dishes were piled up and the laundry needs to be folded oh and i really need to organize my house…) I was thinking about how I always remember my mom being that kind of mom that played with us built forts, climb trees, roller skating, running, slip in slides, dolls, swings, any and everything. Im sure the house was clean and I know we ate because I grew up but i don't remember those things. I remember her standing with me and holding my hand. All that to say…I think I will forgo the chores for the time. Don't be surprised if you stop by to see the dishes still in the sink.. I'll  do them when the girls go to bed.

#write31days

I have been meaning to write more. I almost always think to myself..Im gonna write today. Then today becomes yesterday and I still have not written. I noticed that there is a little 31 days of writing challenge and I have decided that I would use that to help kick start my self!

So thats day one done!
see you tomorrow

All alone

I am sat in front of my computer. With the minutes ticking away before nap time is over. They are going to get up soon. Olivia has not been feeling well and I forced her to take a nap by promising a movie upon her waking up. Isabella is going to be screaming "MAMA MAMA MAMA" all to soon. The other day Olivia was complaining about needing alone time. " Mama, I need some alone time please keep Isabella out of my room." Alone time?  I asked. What is that? To which she replies "you know what it is you get it all the time." PAUSE. In my head I am seriously thinking when! when in the heck am I alone? BREATH. "Really, when do you think mama gets alone time Liv?" "Every night when we go to bed." ROCK TO HEAD! "Yes I suppose that would be correct my alone time is when you are in bed.

So what am I doing with all this "alone time"? What every other momma out there is doing I suppose..Cleaning! Hiding in a closet crying! 

The old saying of Time is passing us by seems so real to me today. The girls are getting older. Baby days are over. I feel like I am watching on the side. I am trying to relish in these days I have. I know all to fast they will be the days I want back at some point. I know there will come a time when the girls will have there own lives and be out and about. Im told by ones further down this road then I, that I will miss these days of No alone time. I will miss all the screaming and fighting. I will miss all the messiness. To these people I say NO I WONT! I WILL miss aspects of my life as a young mother. However, I will not miss the noise level that is off the charts. I will not miss the tugging and pulling. Just like I do not miss night time feeds and milk blisters. I don't miss baby food poops. I look forward to going to the bathroom with out two young faces starring at me and commenting on the smell! I look forward to the time that I can take a shower without the pointing fingers from behind the glass door. (Yes, I close the door but it doesn't stop the dynamic duo!)

Today I will choose to focus on the fact that Alone Time is not ME Time. In all honestly Alone Time hasn't been ME time since I had children. Children I prayed and Believed for! Reminding myself to take in all the crazy with all the lovely! Learning to rest. Rest in all that HE has gifted, trusted and equipped me to have.Being grateful and thankful at all times. The loud,squashed,filled to overflowing, crazy times! Here's to me. Growing up! 

One month in.

WE ARE ALIVE!
WE STILL LIKE EACH OTHER!

These were two of my worries starting this homeschooling journey. Amazingly we have had success.
This month has been so busy. Its actually not that much different than other months. I think there is always something to keep us busy and we tend to shift one thing over for another.

Truth:
No matter who we are or what stage in life we are in we are always facing a challenge.
Home schooling Olivia has really fit right into our day to day life. Its nice to have a schedule. I love schedules! I really do. I will be honest and say that my goal to be dressed and ready for the day before we start school has not been met yet. I mean I have clothes on just not anything I would want to be seen in. So what, I'm the teacher in her PJ'S. I am working on this though. Its been noticed. Someone little told me recently I look like Fancy Nancy's momma. "Oh wow" I thought she must be really pretty. lol
forgetting what she looked like in the book. She's pretty but we both have the same MOMMA Look. Work out Clothes (cause then maybe people will think "oh she just came from the gym") pony tail and no makeup. This pretty much sums up my uniform. I am trying to get out of this rut! Lord knows I need  help. I guess it comes down to not really caring about yourself and being to tired taking care of all the other things around me. Its the typical momma thing always taking care of everyone and everything around you but not YOU. Needless to say I see this and I know I have changes to make.

Classroom Love:
I love having a classroom. I love having a kindergartener. She is so excited about everything we talk about. She hates sitting still and doing quiet work. She challenges me and reminds me daily that I am loved! This month the highlights have been watching her read a book to me. I am seeing how she learns best anything hands on and she is a go. We have been so blessed by this sweet time together.
Yes there are days were I think there is no way I can do this today or I want to scream SIT DOWN AND SHUT IT! But, even in those times i remind myself I cant be the only one screaming that in my head. there are other teachers other homeschooling momma's and papa's thinking the same thing.

So all in all I am happy with our first month. We are still alive and we still like each other. Maybe that doesn't seem like that much of a success. I'll take it. lol
Next month maybe I get out of my uniform and blowdry my hair. Goals are a good thing!

Bless you sweet friends for reading my post. May the Lord shine brightly upon you today! You are Loved!

Day 3

Just finished up day 3!
I am really learning how Olivia learns. I am asking that the Lord open my eyes to see how to teach her in the best way for her. She is loving the schedule and knowing that the school room doors open at 8:45am and class starts at 9. So far she is awake by 6:30 am asking is it time yet? So grateful for the adventure we are on.
I am finding it to be challenging during some moments mainly the ones which require her to do things she is not interested in. Oh you know like sitting still and reading! So, I am already seeing how we can change things from day to day to fit our needs.
I honestly am so focused on the schooling right now that my house has taken a back seat, like the last seat in a greyhound bus near the bathroom! I am giving myself this first week to focus on the schooling only and just let the chips fall where they may. Praying for Balance.

How do you handle it?
How do you handle the balance between babies and homeschooling your older children?

Here is my moment of realness... My goal was to be up and dressed (hair done, make up on) and ready for the day before we started school. 1out of 3 isn't bad! try again tomorrow. The funniest thing to me is that Olivia thinks having a picture in your outfit before school is apart of the daily schooling process. She doesn't think its only for the first and last day. At least we don't have to a student-teacher picture daily! Especially on the days I am still in my PJs.

Be Blessed!